Washington, DC Cats all over the country are reporting issues with their bowls. This is a national disaster of epic proportions, and some experts believe it may be worldwide.

Cats everywhere are reporting empty bowls, with servants who are refusing to refill the bowl in a timely manner. Copper, the lead investigator into this phenomenon, spoke with media outlets this morning.

“We received a number of complaints about this bowl issue. Initially, our investigation led us to believe that the problem was with the servants. However, the scale and other evidence suggested that this was unlikely. We now believe that while we can clearly see that the bowl is empty, the servants can not. We think that this issue is to do with the manufacturing process of the bowl. We are still investigating, and a report should be available in the next few weeks.”

Cats all over are eagerly awaiting the outcome of the investigation. Many cats are hopeful that there will be a quick resolution to the problem.  

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